It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single human in possession of a good space telescope, must be in search of a space vampire. Here, we showcase our search for transit signatures of tidally locked space vampires, trapped in the gravitational pull of late M-dwarfs. We generate forward models representing two potential space vampire populations - those in bat shape and those in humanoid shape. We search lightcurves from the Transiting Exo-Vampire Survey Satellite (TEvSS) using a template matching algorithm and fit them using our allesfitter software. Adding the information gained from TEvSS data, we greatly decrease the uncertainty for the existence and occurrence rates of space vampires, and constrain eta(space vampire) to a range of 0% to 100% (or more). These precise analyses will be crucial for optimizing future observing schedules for space-vampire characterization with the James Webb Space-Vampire Telescope (JWSvT) and the Extremely-Large-Vampire Telescopes (ELvTs).