Accurate mass and velocity functions of dark matter haloes

N-body cosmological simulations are an essential tool to understand the observed distribution of galaxies. We use the MultiDark simulation suite, run with the Planck cosmological parameters, to revisit the mass and velocity functions. At redshift z = 0, the simulations cover four orders of magnitude in halo mass from ∼10¹¹M_⊙ with 8783 874 distinct haloes and 532 533 subhaloes. The total volume used is ∼515 Gpc³, more than eight times larger than in previous studies. We measure and model the halo mass function, its covariance matrix w.r.t halo mass and the large-scale halo bias. With the formalism of the excursion-set mass function, we explicit the tight interconnection between the covariance matrix, bias and halo mass function. We obtain a very accurate (<2 per cent level) model of the distinct halo mass function. We also model the subhalo mass function and its relation to the distinct halo mass function. The set of models obtained provides a complete and precise framework for the description of haloes in the concordance Planck cosmology. Finally, we provide precise analytical fits of the V_max maximum velocity function up to redshift z < 2.3 to push for the development of halo occupation distribution using V_max. The data and the analysis code are made publicly available in the Skies and Universes data base.